Sorry for the delay on returning to action, guys. My computer has been messing with me, and using the old desktop was something I've been trying to avoid. However, political insanity is calling me, and I must answer the call.
--> As most of you probably know, I'm now packing heat. At least, the Supreme Court assumes I am, and has no problem with it. Five of our illustrious justices (the 4 Ultra-Cons - Scalia, Thomas, Alito, and Roberts - and Anthony "Vote Where the Wind Takes Me" Kennedy) chose to uphold our individual right to bear arms. The early impact of this decision would seem to suggest that the Supreme Court sides with McCain and not Obama. However, the larger picture is that this may very well take the issue off the table for the fall election, limiting the ability of Republicans to suggest that Democrats will take away their guns. In the end, we can all rest easy knowing that bitter Pennsylvanians can loosen their collective grip on their guns. Now we just have to get them to stop clinging to religion.
--> Former Supreme Commander of NATO Wesley Clark (D) went after McCain's military credentials today, a move that may quietly position him better for the VP slot on the Obama ticket (I mean, how could a bland, white name like "Clark" not help improve sounds-like-Iraq-Hussein-Osama's image?). Key quote: “I don’t think getting in a fighter plane and getting shot down is a qualification to become president.” It's odd, albeit not surprising, that this phenomenon of military service has developed. Apparently, being a soldier makes you qualified to command the whole army. I know that there is some logic to it (understanding the psychology of war, relating to the troops, etc.), but command ability and combat ability are significantly different. It seems that the last presidential election, and the attacks on John Kerry's 3 Purple Hearts, affirmed that military service is not off-limits in a campaign.
--> This week, obviously inspired by the new high school Lincoln-Douglas topics, Senate Republicans will re-introduce the constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. With a Democratic majority in Congress, this has absolutely no chance of passing, but Republicans are obviously worried about the approaching election, and have discovered that they can rally the conservative troops by pretending to advance their agenda. The interesting part of this bill is two of its co-sponsors: Senator Larry Craig (R-ID) and Senator David Vitter (R-LA). Both are ultra-conservatives, but the former solicited sex from a male police officer in an airport bathroom and the latter was a preferred customer of a DC prostitution ring. Not exactly poster boys for the family values crowd (especially Craig, who clearly wasn't planning on making an honest man of that police officer).
--> Having already played Muhammad Ali in film (see the picture above Barack), Will Smith is already auditioning for the role of Barack Obama in any future bio-pic. The key, Smith notes, is his big ears (and yes, he made this joke himself; this isn't my humor, although I would have gone there anyway). My suggestion for other casting: Smith plays the cocky, smooth-talkin Senator from Illinois opposite Tommy Lee Jones as his white, stiff sidekick: Hillary Clinton. Let's be honest here, who doesn't want to see those two reunite? I've already stated plainly that No Country for Old Men would have been a better film with Will Smith sitting next to Tommy Lee Jones as a sidekick in all those scenes. So I guess, building on this theme, that Michelle Obama would have to be played by either Linda Fiorentino or Rosario Dawson. Plus, John McCain would have to be played by this guy:
Wait for October of this year, when John McCain swallows Hillary Clinton, who then blows him up from the inside.
--> New York Times columnist and EDC favorite Frank Rich today wrote a scathing editorial about John McCain (surprised?). The "news" here is that Rich unfortunately made a mistake: the character's name is SpongeBob SquarePants, not SquareBob SpongePants. Yup...this really is all that I have to say negatively about Frank Rich.
--> Governor and Evil-Spock Impersonator Bill Richardson (D-NM) made an oops the other day. Despite being one of the strongest Obama surrogates on the campaign trail, and a major voice in the immigration debate, he proceeded to priase Senator McCain's record on immigration. That's right, he used the adjective "good" to describe it.
More tomorrow, as EDC continues its quest to get back on track.
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